Vacation USA 2012?????

It's 8:45am on a Saturday morning, and I've already been awake for three hours.  Why was I up so early, you may ask?  Well, you can thank this for interrupting my sleep. 

This is Typhoon Guchol.  It is wreaking havoc on my Vacation USA 2012 travel plans.  Over the last 5 days it's taken us on a roller coaster ride of emotions. First it didn't look like it was coming towards Okinawa, then it looked like it was going to land right on top of Okinawa, and now the latest is that it's going to swerve east of Okinawa.  I've become a little obsessed with this thing.  It's not an exaggeration to say that I could have become a meteorologist based on the number of hours I've spent poring over the various typhoon tracking websites.  I've looked at the American ones, the Japanese ones, even took a peek to see what the Chinese and Koreans predicted.  I know what times they update their forecasts (every six hours.)  I've learned to translate the meteorological lingo and have become quite proficient at converting UTC (Coordinated Universal Time) into Japanese time.   I've googled wind speed and aviation and researched the maximum knots of wind speed in which a plane is safe to take off.  (Unfortunately, there's no magic number....it depends on about 17 different factors that you "lay people" probably wouldn't understand.)  I've called two different airlines asking when they think they'll know if the flights will be cancelled, and is there any possible way they might be able to squeeze 6 people onto on airplane on Sunday instead of Monday.  They've all been very polite and tolerated my frustration and whining quite well, but in the end the answer is they can't do anything until the flight is officially cancelled.  I've even enlisted Bill's help in this mania.  Yesterday I sent him this crazy email....

I told you....obsessed doesn't begin to describe my condition. 

My always-steady husband has taken a different approach on our situation.   His tone wavers from unconcerned ("Oh, we will be long gone before this thing gets here.....") to relaxed ("Okinawans get about 10 typhoons a year....it's no big deal to them...they fly in and out of typhoons all the time!") to mad  ("I can't believe this is F%&#g happening!")   (He didn't really say the "f%$#g" part...but I could tell he was thinking it.)   And, I just noticed an empty bottle of Gin on the counter, so either he had a crazy party during the 5 hours that I slept last night, or he's drowning his sorrows in liquor.  Some people drink....some obsess over websites and write crazy blogs.  No judgment people.....unless you've walked in these shoes you just don't know! 

This has all been very frustrating.  We are supposed to leave around one-ish on Monday afternoon.  Emma bravely asked me yesterday why this was stressing me out so much and I snapped back at her, "Well, we've had this thing planned for four months.  When  you plan something 4 months out, it's because you don't want any surprises, and THIS is a big surprise."  (You  "7 Lenses" people have probably guessed that I'm a gold by now.) 

In other news, the kids had their last day of school on Thursday.  I can't believe the school year is over!  We started the morning off with the official last day of school pictures.

"Mr. Cool" Michael thought this was so embarrassing (because every neighbor is watching us at 6:45am)  So, of course, I had to do this.....

Emma and Andrew were a little more cooperative in their pictures....

Forest Gump here didn't blink on accident.  He thinks it's funny to close his eyes in pictures.  See that sneaky smile on his face? 

I took a break from my meteorological research to go to Emma's awards assembly,

then we officially ended the school year with a celebratory lunch at the Exchange food court....

and then dessert at Big Dip Ice Cream.

Now, we're just playing the waiting game trying to figure out what ol' Guchol is going to do.  The girls and I have pre-Vacation pedicures scheduled for this afternoon.  At this point, we're still hoping to make it Indiana this week and our high school reunion next weekend.  I had hoped to look well-rested and put together by then so that my envious classmates would think that the last 20 years were a breeze, but there's a good chance we'll look harried and exhausted.  So, when you see us, just smile, lie and say we look great, and show us where the bar is....because we'll probably need it. 

Vacation USA 2012!

The last several months I have been busily planning our summer trip back home.  (or to "The States" as Mary and the rest of the kids call it--that's the lingo around here.)  Flights have been booked, cars have been rented, and lists have been made.  Mary even made her own list: 

Mary's List:  Book, DVD, nail polish, barbies, gum, snacks

As you can see, Mary's packing needs don't change much.  You'll remember her attempts to "help" the packers on our way out here.  Here is what she planned on bringing to Okinawa: 

It's going to be a busy vacation, and I have no doubt I'll be needing another vacation upon my return to Okinawa.   In the interest of operation security (or OPSEC, as the military folks like to say) I'll be a little vague on dates and exact locations.  You people who know me will know exactly what I'm talking about.  You crazy people reading this hopefully won't be able to find me.

In a few days (!) we will start our short 22 hour journey to Chicago with our four lovely, hopefully quiet, peaceful children.  As an added perk, Bill is joining us for this part of the trip.  We have 2 layovers, but the majority of the flight will take place during (our) night time, which is good because on the off chance our plane plunges into the Pacific Ocean, hopefully I'll sleep right through it. Through the magic of air travel, we will leave Okinawa in the early afternoon, but we make our first landing in the US earlier that same morning. 

Once we get to Chicago, we'll enjoy a 2-hour drive Bill's brother's house  At "In-Law Manor" we will likely find a comfortable bed and plenty of alcoholic beverages  coffee to help in the jet-lag recovery.  For 48 hours we'll enjoy late nights and long talks with the relatives while Mary terrorizes the cousins' bunny rabbit.   

Then we're back to Chicago for a 5:45am flight to Florida.  Upon arrival we'll hopefully be greeted by smiles and hugs from patiently awaiting family members.  However, one family member will be predictably missing as he'll be circling the airport in an effort stick it to the bureaucrats and avoid the outrageous parking fees.   Once luggage has been found and one or two children have been retrieved from riding the baggage carousal, we'll head on over to the car rental counter where we'll sign over our firstborn for the opportunity to rent two vehicles from their establishment.  (Two cars are cheaper than one mini-van!  Go figure!) 

Surprisingly, I'm a little more concerned about American driving habits than I thought I'd be.  I've finally gotten used to walking up to the right side of the car and now I'll have to readjust to the steering wheel being on the left. I'll also have to remind yourself that people drive on the right side of the road in the good ol' USA.  Old ladies with walkers will surely be passing me as I get used to driving faster than 25 miles an hour.

I don't think I'll be a very pleasant passenger, either, as I've really gotten used to the slow ride.  The other day Bill was driving a blazing 60 kph (36 mph) and more than once the phrase "YOU'RE GOING TO KILL US!" flew out of my mouth.   Bottom line, it might be better for everyone involved if am the only occupant in the vehicle. 

Our first stop....CRACKER BARREL.  That's the place Bill and I the kids chose for their first real American experience.  We realize some newer, trendier, probably healthier establiments have probably opened in the year we've been out of the USA, but since we're flying halfway around the world we've decided to be selfish and not ask anyone else where they'd rather go.  Family and friends are welcome to join us, as long as they promise not to mention how many calories are in the yummy, cheesy hash browns.  I'm already dreaming about the little syrup bottles.   Although it's only 2.16 miles from the airport, due to my slow driving it will probably take me 45 minutes to get there, so be patient. 

After a filling breakfast and a painful stroll through the Country Store (where we'll have to say "no" to a child every 4.2 seconds) we'll head on to some relative's house (probably my parents.) But, there's no time to relax.  The following weekend we'll go back in time to 1992, where Bill and I will reminisce with old friends at our 20 year high school reunion.  Twenty Years!  I still can't believe it. 

We'll spend the next week and a half trudging back and forth between relatives' homes.  With any luck we'll spend our days chatting and enjoying the company of the loved ones we've missed in the year overseas.  We will certainly not be exploring the zoo in 95 degree weather, nor will we be taking any rainy day bus tours through historical parts of town.   In 10 short days, I'll be back at the airport to return Bill to Okinawa, so that he may continue earning the paycheck that finances these adventurous travels. 

This starts the most stressful exciting part of the trip...my solo tour  (with four children.)  Every effort will be made to prevent emergency room visits, vomiting children, or any other natural or man-made disasters....but nothing is off the table! 

The next few weeks will hopefully be filled with lazy days at the beach (complete with waves!),  shopping trips to Walmart, Target, Old Navy, and meals at Chick Fil A, Firehouse Subs, and IHOP.  We'll soak up as much of America as we can in 3 1/2 short weeks (while staying in one town) and--after sharing meals, houses, and bathrooms and mediating 216 cousin squabbles--we'll pack up our bags again for the long trip back to Okinawa. 

Before we know it we'll be back at the airline ticket counter weighing our luggage.  There will be another hopefully brief and not too tearful goodbye, and another flight to Chicago.  There will be a short overnight stay in the Windy City, and we'll finally embark on the flight back over the Pacific. 

All this, of course, is at the mercy of Mother Nature.  Just 10 minutes ago I received an informational email suggesting we make preparations for this: 

Ah, this pesky Typhoon Season!  It makes perfect sense that we flew into Okinawa at the tail end of a typhoon, and now as we're trying to leave as another one is threatening to derail our plans.  It's still quite a few days out, so hopefully the path will change and more over towards China.  (That's what you get for being Communist!)  Also, it seems to be a fast mover, so if it does head in our direction hopefully it will pass quickly and we can get on our way.  I have no idea how that would affect our flight plans (trying to find six seats on a flight is not an easy task!) but I'm not going to worry about that right now.  At any rate, please pray this thing doesn't affect our trip.  

This has been the longest I've ever been apart from my family, and we have all been looking forward to this vacation for a long time.  We have all gone through many changes, but I'm sure once we get back it will be like no time has passed.  We can't wait!